I guess its time to post but, damn, I do not have much to report. Life has been decidedly uninteresting. I am in a sort of purgatory here. Of course most of my time is spent taking care of my health. My Gerson duties take up a pretty significant chunk of my day. Beyond that I do not have much leftover energy.
It’s kind of torturous because now that I’ve peered into the eyes of death there is so much I want to do with my life. Travel is big, but of course, currently impossible. Oh, and then there is the little issue of my life’s purpose. I will get better. I know this in my heart of hearts. And then what? I think it may be near-impossible to go back into the world of graphic design unless I choose to freelance. I read recently that something like 45% of the pollution we encounter during the course of the day is in the hour that we spend in our cars commuting, even if you put your system on recycled air. Every morning crossing the Howard Franklin Bridge on my way into Tampa I would see the dingy brown stain that blurred up the skyline and I would think “How awful, I am contributing to this.” It comes as no surprise to me that both diagnoses were following jobs that required a longer commute.
Even if I did find an ad agency within close proximity to my home (not likely) there would be the little issue of explaining the gap in my resume. I would have to lie and I usually chicken out and tell the truth. But the truth would not serve me. I had a pretty hard time concealing my past breast cancer. I made a point not to bring it up when I met new people. It’s in my past I would tell myself. I tried so hard to resist becoming a breast cancer mascot. I did not want my story to define me. So I hid it. As much as I tried to trivialize what had happened, it was a big deal. Concealing it ultimately made me feel alienated from others. As much as I tried to run from it, it found me.
And then there is the issue of juicing. Could you imagine one of your coworkers excusing themselves once an hour to make juice on a 70lb juicer with a hydraulic press? Can you imagine the company refrigerator overflowing with organic produce? Unless I get a job at a health food store, this is just not an option.
I just erased a paragraph of ranting about western medicine. I’d love to bitch about it but I think I’ll just let my story stand as an example of the miraculous healing powers of natural medicine instead.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned from watching you battle cancer it’s this… You can’t compromise. No matter how the odds are stacked against you. No matter how prevelent “western” medicine ideology is. No matter what.
Life and happiness are too precious to waste waiting for “some day”. I personally believe that your dedication and conviction for healthful living is too strong to succomb to anything as silly as popular opinion. When the time is right your new path will present itself. In the mean time just try to enjoy a good book, sun bathing and galactica.
PS: I meant galaga…. silly me.
Oh yeah, I didn’t mean that I would stop doing everything for a job, I just don’t think there are many workplaces where what I do would be understood or tolerated. As it is, the authorities on the subject do not recommend that survivors or those who still have breast cancer inform their employers of it. Employers don’t want to be accused of discrimination so they generally don’t want to know about your health issues. Home-based employment will be an absolute necessity for me for a few years.
She ~
Hello, my dear. I have a special interest in this post, not only as your e-friend but as a human resources professional. But before I get on my professional schpeel… Travel will be possible and I have no doubt some serious globe-trotting will be in your future. You’ve not been blessed with the photographer’s/artist’s eye (whatever you choose to call that innate ability to see composition and design) to not traipse across the globe with camera/mixed-media supplies in hand. Not everyone has the ability to see images, process shape & see spatial relationships/texture/color. As sappy as it may sound, it’s a gift. As with all gifts, you gotta feed the beast (or if you’re anything like me, unhappiness set in if you don’t…). I can’t imagine better creative sustenance than living the life of a vagabond artist for awhile.
Hmmm. You seem worried about this ‘gap’ in your resume. As someone who goes through resume after resume on a daily basis, please be assured that breaks in someone’s employment timeline are not ‘red flags’ to employers. Shame on the person or sub-par HR personnel who started this myth! Skills and competencies are the only thing I look at when reviewing a resume. If someone meets the minimum requirements of the position, any savvy HR professional/recruiter is looking for skills and competencies after that point. I’ve never dwell on timeline. If anything ‘superficial’ is a red flag for me, it’s formatting & grammar. Poor proof-reading & ungrammatical content will get you kicked out the applicant pool, not a gap in employment.
If you do get to the phone or face-to-face interview stage, a potential employer may ask about gaps on a resume but it’s usually to determine if that individual was fired/let go for a just cause/in prison. The answer “I was out on disability for a long-term illness” is sufficient. No one can ever ask you about that illness, health etc. If they do, then you have a potential discrimination law suit on you hands! A good employer won’t care if you took 2 years off to live on a kibbutz in Israel, stayed at home until your kids were in school, or backpacked in Asia for the majority of your 20’s if you’ve got what they’re looking in an employee. Typically, they’re looking for smart, talented & competent employees ~ like YOU!
Our Web Content Manager works out of her home & she has a very tidy salary. Our Human Resources Information System Manager does too. I know my company isn’t the only employer who’s embracing the idea of a non-centralized/remote workforce. So… I guess my point is “Don’t worry!” When you’re ready to go back to work, you will have choices available to you. There will be no scarlet letter you’re required to carry back into the work world. You carry yourself, head up and confident that you have a lot to offer an employer. If you’re strong enough to negotiate your way with cancer, negotiating your ideal job will be easier than you anticipate right now. Who you are transcends cancer but it’s an important part of your story. Who knows? Maybe your Gerson’s advocacy will play a part in your future career. Maybe you decide to start your own business & be your own boss. The possibilities are endless! I, for one, will be interested to see what career path you take and what opportunities unfold for you when you’re ready.
As always, you rock…
Be well,
Britt